to my number one creeper fan: quit sippin on that haterade.

It was freaking BEAUTIFUL out today. So beautiful, in fact, that I had an episode. A hypomanic episode to be exact. You see, as a victim of hypomania, my mood is severely influenced by beautiful weather. My hypomanic episode consists of euphoria, a flood of ideas, attention deficiency, and inflated self-esteem. This would all be fine, aside from the fact that my biology midterm was this afternoon. In my euphoric state, I felt no need to study, and my inflated self-esteem assured me that I was good to go. Instead of spending the morning studying as I had intended to, I went out to lunch with sweet baby Kerry and fulfilled the Willy's craving that came over me last night. And dios mios was it delicious!! I got a burrito in a bowl. Best thing EVERRR! It's like all the goodness of nacho toppings slash burrito innards with delicious chips on the side. SO your chips don't get soggy like they would with nachos and you can evenly distribute deliciousness on each chip which you cannot do with burrito bites. But I digress.

So I got to my bio midterm all happy go lucky, aware of my scanty knowledge of the material and yet not at all worried. I sat down with my scantron and felt no nerves whatsoever, then a test was passed to me and I began. I remember sitting there bubbling in my scantron without a care in the world--guessing every so often without the slightest clue as to whether or not my response was even an educated guess. I finished up and didn't bother looking over my answers, sure that I'd done well enough. I turned in my test with a big dopey smile spread across my face and just about skipped out of the lecture hall. I damn near skipped my last class so I could soak up the sun and people watch on north campus, but somehow I made my way to Caldwell and sat through an hour of nonsensical discussion about Dreaming in Cuban. At least in my head it was nonsensical--I had about a million different thoughts racing through my head at once. I pulled up like 5 different windows on Safari, while texting 3 different people and keeping up with our small group discussion of the novel.

My euphoria and ego boost and ADD have continued on in that way all day. Now that the sun is setting I think I might be calming down, but then again Wikipedia says these episodes last 4 days. And I don't care what anyone says--Wikipedia never lies.

This weekend Smel and I are driving up to Charleston to meet up with Holly Berry and go to Carolina Cup! I cannot wait!!! It's the light at the end of the tunnel that is this week. Tomorrow morning at 8 am I will be taking a Spanish exam with sweet Fuad, then Thursday a Linguistics test with my freak professor woman, and Friday we have a French paper due. Vom. I'm so over this semester. Except for my life will be void of meaning without seeing Fuad every Tuesday and Thursday at 8 am. I don't want to talk about it.

GREAT NEWS! 11 months and 3 days until I turn 21.

Our back porch furniture is currently housing every wasp and giant mutant bee in Athens. We have just about gone through 18 ounces of Raid trying to discourage the new hang out spot. Struggles. Today in battle Steen threw our entire screen door on top of one of the mutant bees. Valiant Ali opened up the table umbrella for easier access to their humble abode. We are the masters of our domain. TAKE THAT SUCKAAAS

As sweet Kerry so perceptively pointed out, yesterday's urbandictionary Word of the Day epitomizes me. Bitchassness: a term coined by Diddy on Making the Band. Overall stank actions towards others through words, facial expressions, and/or song. Symptoms include: thinking you're better than those around you, not speaking your true feelings, throwing large amounts of shade.

In my bio class we were talking about a gene mutation that makes your pee turn purple or black with oxidation. Even if you have it, you would never know because we never pee in a cup and let it sit out til it turns colors. Meems and I have decided to take on this feat for the benefit of the world and for our own personal knowledge. I will let you know the results when we find them. However, I just stumbled upon a website that instructs you on how to induce peeing colors of the rainbow. Read up! But please don't try any of them because most of them are medical conditions...

Okay it's time for my Skype date with Tommy.

peace love and tipper love

You guys I feel pretty terrible about leaving you hanging for almost an entire month.

Currently our home is without internet. I'm sitting at the SLC (aka MLC for uga newbies and other such losers) with the intent of studying for my bio midterm tomorrow but the unadulterated availability of internet should not be wasted on stupid biology! Sweet sweet internet. Swoon.

Sadly the new facebook layout is the worst thing that's ever happened in the history of facebook. Yes--including facebook chat. It's like the generic brand of Twitter. Pathetic, really. I don't even like the real Twitter much less some knockoff shiz. So that really deters my favorite pastime that is facebook stalking. No worries. I have many other ways to completely piss away my life with the internet. Obvi there is perez, youtube, FML, overheard in athens, Skype, other blogs, etc. Kittens Inspired by Kittens is my current favorite youtube video. "IM HER MOM! NO SHES NOT!" "I have to go potty... PSSSSSSSS" Classic.

My obsession with Lady Gaga lives on. She's amazing. I saw a clip of her concert on perez and am DYING to go. Ah love her love her love her.

Twilight came out on DVD this weekend. Melanie is a goddess and went and bought the three disc set and brought it to me to pull me out of my morning-after funk yesterday. Nothing like a good dose of Edward to make your problems disappear. There is no other man that can make me forget about a lost Coach wristlet chock full of my most prized possessions--debit card, fake id, regular id, and burt's--except for Edward. Yes. I was that girl on Friday night. Deepest apologies to the world for the mess I was on Friday. As my mother so eloquently put it, "Wow Sarah you must have been really shitfaced." Yes mother dearest I'd have to agree. I held my head high as I walked into Generals in search of the lost wallet last night and had to respond "I don't remember" to all of the questions the bartenders asked. Struggles. They didn't have it, but after dinner I got a fb message from my new most favorite person in the world saying she found it on a couch at Delta Sig and hid it so no one would steal it! OH HAPPY DAY! Love life. Love Madeline.

Last night was Melanie's birthday party. Great night. Unlike Friday which was a terrible night. Here are some ways that I am able to distinguish between the two:

1. On Saturday morning I woke up at a dirty frat house without the slightest recollection of anything past 11pm the night before. Panic attack ensued shortly thereafter but I quickly calmed myself down for fear my head was going to explode. This morning I woke up under a down comforter in a clean and quiet sorority house without the slightest inkling of a hangover. Or a panic attack.
2. On Saturday morning I found scratches all over my legs. Apparently I fell. A lot. On Sunday morning I woke up and was still scratched and bruised from Saturday but I'm pretty sure I don't have any new battle wounds. Yay me.
3. On Saturday morning I woke up and had to bail on Cayms for yoga because I was still drunk. On Sunday morning I had no plans but if I did I wouldn't have cancelled them.
4. On Saturday morning the thought of food made me want to vomit. On Sunday morning I had a delicious chicken biscuit and iced coffee from McDonalds. Did not vomit.
5. On Saturday morning I woke up and realized I had lost my wallet. My priorities were definitely in order though because my crackberry was snuggled up right next to me on the bed. On Sunday morning my wallet was sitting on the headboard. Right next to the crackberry.
6. On Saturday I was unable to function for the majority of the day. I spent my time rejuvenating myself knowing that I'd be expected to throw down for smel's bday. Today I am still not functioning in a very productive sort of way, but it's not for the lack of ability.

The only confusing element would be the fact that I woke up in all of my own clothes on Saturday morning (generally the sign of a successful night). This morning, however, I woke up in a boy's sweatshirt and another boy's driving moccassins. I left my own shoes, jacket, purse, keys, and other random articles of clothing that I had in my purse at yousef's house. However, when looking at all of the data as a whole I am able to definitively rule out this last factor and conclude that indeed Friday was a bad night and Saturday was a good night.

Okay I told some girl I'd go find her in the SLC and study with her for bio like 30 minutes ago. I should probably go ahead and find her. I promise to update again soon though. Love you all.

peace love and .com

Sugar Daddy Wanted, Apply Within.

LOADED MAN-BOY WANTED.

Pretty college girl in Athens is looking for a wealthy man-boy between the ages of 21 and 30 to be her sugar daddy. I party like a rockstar and need someone who can keep up. I am proficient in conversational French and Spanish and can fly planes. I like dancing, traveling, and the lifestyles of the rich and famous. Man-boy must love sushi and be healthy and rich. Royalty is a plus.

hello world.

I decided to give up on my francais devoirs and devote myself to a quality post instead. You are welcome.

So lent starts today.. I actually kind of hate Ash Wednesday because I have always been that idiot girl that tells people they have something on their forehead, thinking I am being a good person because no one else will tell the poor girl that she has black crap all across her face. Sigh. I never learn, either. I'm pretty sure I have managed to do that every year of my education career. I just don't respond well to things being out of context. I am much better at life when I know what to expect and where to expect it. If I sat in church all day I wouldn't be motioning to people to wipe their forehead. I mean I like to think so at least. I am also not a fan of surprises. Take note.

So lent. It always sneaks up on me. Now it's the start and I have no idea what the heck to give up. Yesterday I was running ideas by Abby.. it went something like this:

Abby: "Ali is giving up sweets and soda. Wouldn't it be cool if all four of us [roomies] gave up sweets together?"

Me: "F that."

Abby: "Well I'm giving up milk chocolate. It's going to be rough because that's what's in baked goodies and most candy, you know?"

Me: "Wow yeah I definitely can't do that. What if I gave up texting?"

Abby: (hysterical laughter) "YEAH RIGHT!"

Me: "Okay okay you're right.. what about.. no, no. I couldn't do that. Or.. no. There's no way. Uhh Lean Cuisines?"

Abby: ...

Me: "You're right. That's lame. Crap. I give up."

So I am still without something to give up for lent. Kerry and I toyed with the idea of giving up Amy McCoy. I would miss her entirely too much though. I need some ideas, peeps. ASAP.

Last night I went to Roswell for a Nagoya birthday fix. It was incredible. The only problem was that stupid Paul is still in a stupid growth spurt and was inhaling MY sushi. We ordered 6 rolls. AND sashimi. AND edamame. For four of us. Paul was still hungry. We usually try to fill him with fried rice before the sushi comes out so that we are on a level playing field, but in all of the birthday excitement we forgot. F our lives.

Yesterday in Spanish Fuad winked at me and called me Sarah-ita again. I died. He also busted out with a little salsa action, and unnamed certified d bag goes "GET IT FUAD!" Fuad replied that salsa is his specialty and that he cannot wait to bring the ipod and teach us all his moves. I'm pumped. Fuad also kicked over some girl's coffee this morning, and then ran out of the class to get paper towels, then gave the paper towels to the girl and made her clean it up. bahahaha I was cracking up long after everyone else had finished with their inaudible chuckles. Embarrassing.

Last night Victoria revived my love for Bon Qui Qui. Girl I will CUT you.

My birthday is TOMORROW. I cannot wait. Here are a few reasons why February 26 is the best day of the year:

• I get to wear my tiara.
• Hollis and Jenny are coming.
• I get to be as narcissistic as I please (Melanie would argue "as opposed to the days that you aren't??")
• I get to stuff my face with Agua Linda for lunch. While wearing a giant pink sombrero.
• I get to stuff my face with Shokitini sushi. While wearing my tiara.
• Karaoke.
• Cake.
• Dranks. Fo free.
• New dresses.
• Photo shoots.

EEEEEEEEE

okay f I have to go to french.

deuces.

So as it turns out I am the worst valentine the world has ever known. Here are the top five reasons why I was able to definitively come to this conclusion:

1. My being a texting whore. Between the hours of 9pm and 2am there are a total of 187 text messages that were both sent and received on my crackberry. one. hundred. eighty. seven. This may have taken a slight toll on the face time actually spent with my valentine.
2. My sketchiness. I managed to sketch off about once an hour on average probably. Lie. Probably more. This is a rather difficult feat when 2 of those hours were spent in the relatively small area of a fraternity house, but that did not stop me. Nope. I have sketching skillz.
3. I am coming to find that I have this terrible habit of getting really sulky when things do not go my way. Like yesterday, for example, when I went out to lunch with the future roomies and I wanted delicious queso from Agua Linda. Kerry shot me down, and we ended up at stupid Inoko Express. I wanted to vomit. I refused to order anything and pouted as I sipped on my [overpriced] Diet Coke. I wear my emotions on my face right where everyone can see them, so the rooms all knew that I was down but could not figure out why. I realized it was because things had not gone my way and felt ridiculous. So I'm working on that.. starting today I suppose. Last night I wanted to stop by a party before heading dt, then got pissed when it became apparent to me that that was not going to happen. Then every time I suggested a bar dt, I was shot down. I am not so much a fan of being shot down. I despise it, actually. Loathe it entirely.
4. My severe lack of class. Between downing a bottle of wine and dancing on tables at Bourbon, it was not a classy night for the princess. To say the least.
5. I walked away from my valentine at the end of the evening with another boy without saying anything. Then found my own ride to my own home.

Sigh. Well at least it's over. Sorry valentine!

I have a new favorite website: fmylife.com.

Here are a few of my favorite FML stories:

•  Today, I was trying on lingerie in the dressing room of Victoria's Secret with my boyfriend next to me. I told him in a seductive, playful tone "you can stay and watch if you give me a piece of your gum." He said "No I only have three more" and left the room. FML.
  
• Today, on campus, these really overly-happy people were walking around with big signs saying "free hugs". When I walked towards them, their smiles faded, and they put their signs down. FML.
• Today my mother and I got into a huge fight about me being a lesbian. It ended with me saying "Fuck you!" to which she responded: "I bet you'd like to." FML.
• Today my boyfriend was tapping on my thigh to the beat of the music when we were driving to dinner. When I asked him what he was doing he replied, "Just watching the ripples." FML.
• Today, I bit into my egg sandwich, and when I looked back into it, there were 5 long, gray hairs leading from the sandwich to my mouth. FML.
• Today I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to girl?" It was my dad. FML.
• Today, when my boyfriend and I were lying in bed, he grabbed my double chin and goes "gobble gobble!" FML.
• Today I went to a fast food restaurant to pick up food for my work party. I ordered 250 chicken fingers, 15 orders of fries, and 2 gallons of iced tea, and the guy behind the counter asked, "Is this for here or to go?" FML.

Okay I had to make myself stop reading 10 pages deep. I foresee this being problematic.. mostly when I'm reading them in class and bust out cackling when I come across a good one! Like I have been doing for the past 30 minutes in my room alone. The roomies probably think that I'm psychotic. Well at least they know.

25 things on facebook is the greatest thing ever. I love reading them. They are like crack. I have been reading people's that I do not even know. Just friends of friends of friends. I can't get enough. Well except for when they're boring which happens a lot. I LOVED writing my 25 things because I love to talk about myself (obvi). I am constantly thinking of things that I should have mentioned and didn't. 25 is just not enough!! I just about died when I read someone's 25 things and number 20 was "crap I still have five more of these". What a waste! Id!! Lend me some of yours so I can keep talking about meee. Wow. Re-reading this has motivated me to take a quick are you a narcissist quiz online. brb.

FML. "You are a total narcissist. Your ego is totally out of control- and you couldn't care less. As far as you're concerned, you're the most important person in the world- and everyone should treat you as such. While it's good to have high self esteem, you have a strong sense of entitlement. You think you deserve more and better than everyone else.. and that's not cool."

My initial response to this was "What does some stupid quiz know? Its opinion doesn't matter!" Then I thought back to question number 5: If someone disagrees with you... A. You carefully consider what you have to say. B. You don't listen to them at all. Their opinion doesn't matter. C. They are probably right, and you end up changing your mind.

I picked B. So apparently my being right all the time makes me a narcissist. Whatevs!

Last night Scott abbreviated "you're welcome" to "welcs." Props.

Today I skyped with Tommy. I really do not know what I would do without him. I actually caught myself asking him, "How should this make me feel?" on more than one occasion over the course of our convo. He is the voice of reason in my life. Him being in Lyon is not good for me. Tommy is the only person that will tell me Sarah shut up you are being ridiculous and I will listen. Hence this narcissist kick. I lie. This is no kick. This is me. It's just more tangible when Tommy is frenching it up halfway across the freaking world.

And next year Charlie will be frenching it up. ALL YEAR. Luckily I love skyping with Charlie. I will claw my way into his vie francaise because I am scrappy. Like Monica.

Last night when I was dt I saw one of the freaks from my hall last year playing accordion on the street corner. I died. That is just too damn typical for the seventh floor of o house!! How Melanie and I survived those cretins is beyond me. Go us!

Okay I have imparted enough wisdom for one evening. Slash I have got to go get my study on because I did jack shit this entire week. FML.

peace love and gobble gobble!